Lady Confessions: Things I Wish I Would’ve Known Before Being Mommy

What is something you wish you had known before getting pregnant/having kids?

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Having the responsibility of being a Mother, because you love your child or children so much. I would never change a thing…:)

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*your Dr. will stick their entire hand up inside your vagina on several occasions and it is more than just slightly uncomfortable!

*early ultrasounds are done vaginally, with a huge wand thing that looks like dildo. It’s embarrassing and also doesn’t feel that great.

*when your milk comes in, your boobs will be scary big and more painful than ever before!

*until your nipples are used to a little fiend sucking away on them every other hour (I do not exaggerate!) they will crack and bleed and you will tense up with every fiber of your being as that tiny mouth heads toward your breast

*you will get used to breast feeding and even feel like you are good at it…until your baby starts teething!

*you’ll never worry more in your life! From the moment you know that tiny being is inside, to the times you aren’t sure if he/she is moving enough, to hoping you and your baby will be ok during labor, to that whole first year of peeking into the crib to make sure your baby is still breathing! It’s a big long worryfest!

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Well, I can only answer about getting/being pregnant. I’d say that it would have been nice to know that your emotions will run the full gambit from excited to anxious to scared shitless…oftentimes in just minutes. Even when you’re just THINKING about starting a family. Its perfectly normal, and you’re not crazy.  Your life is going to change dramatically, and I think I’d be more worried if you weren’t concerned. Your partner might look at you as if you have a few screws loose, but find a girlfriend you can confide in, and just let it out. Baby making plus stress and anxiety does not equal fetus. Breathe…it’ll be okay.

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 I’m sure I have said, “I wish I would have known”…about having kids several times over the last 11 years, but I am thankful that I didn’t know all that I know now about parenting. Everyday I am learning something different about parenting and with the teen age years just around the corner-I’m sure I am going to realize just how little I know about parenting! : )  I never knew all the emotions that came with being a mom! I now understand when people compare parenting with being on a roller coaster.  It’s the hardest, but most rewarding job out there!

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I wish I had known how noisy new babies are.  Babies huff and snort and sniff and smack and all of those sounds keep you wide awake cause the bassinette the baby is sleeping in is a foot away from your head.  Then there is the quiet which is even scarier!  Finally you can’t stand the quiet and reach over and poke your new baby to make sure he/she is still breathing and you don’t breathe again until the baby does.  Even worse than new baby heebie-jeebies is the when you discover you can’t solve your child’s problems or ease their pain with a kiss and a hug and a colorful bandaid.  The day will come when you no longer have magical mom powers and you can only try to help them through disappointments and sometimes heartaches as best you can.  Whether your child is 13 or 30, you never stop worrying or wanting to help make life a little easier for him or her. Being a mom is the job of a lifetime and, at least for me, it is a lifetime commitment.

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One of the things we learned the hard way from our first born, is that everyone can get conditioned to a routine very quickly.  Once your baby has proven they can sleep just fine through the night but now wants their midnight milk fix, don’t cave in and start!!  After months of daddy getting up to warm the Tommy Tippy cup in the microwave, have her jug it down, and change her diaper, we asked the pediatrician, “why is she doing this?”  His answer was, “why are YOU doing it?  You will not wake up one morning and find she has dehydrated into a pile of dust.”  You learn the hard way with the first one and then have to suffer through about 5 nights of crying to make her realize her nighttime milk fix is over.  But all things come to an end.
Which makes the next point.  When you are exhausted, when you don’t think you can’t wipe away another snot bubble, do another load of laundry and shampoo dried peas out of their hair, it would have been nice for someone to have placed this mantra in my head:   THIS TOO SHALL PASS.   All these phases come to an end and new ones start with their own set of challenges and joys.  That’s what keeps raising kids such an amazing journey.  Everybody is learning.  Kids and parents together.
Lastly,  if you wait for just the perfect time to have children, the right set of circumstances, it will probably never be perfect.  We stressed when we found out we were expecting baby #2 and dad was still in school, we wondered how it would all work out?  Children don’t always come according to our timetable but there is a bigger plan that we don’t always know at the time.  In retrospect, it was THE BEST TIMING ever!! 
A lot of friends read book after book on child-rearing when pregnant.  Just trust your own mother’s instinct which is usually right for you and your baby.
Motherhood:  one of the greatest blessings in my life.  Thanks for asking.

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Categories: Ladies Confess, Spill It: Confessions, Welcome!


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2 Comments on “Lady Confessions: Things I Wish I Would’ve Known Before Being Mommy”

  1. May 15, 2013 at 10:39 am #

    Here was a shocker to me: Babies are born with no nipples. Seriously. Weird, eh?

    The first few months are hard. Most of us cry every day. Then the memories of the “before” time fade and you accept your new role in life and it is easier.

    • Anonymous
      May 15, 2013 at 6:05 pm #

      My baby had nipples! Just very light in color!

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