Bedazzling Your Vajay-jay

Remember those kits you could buy to add a little sparkle to your wardrobe. Well now there’s a more intimate version available to women of the world, and it’s called Vajazzling.

I’m not making this shit up.

There’s a new trend for women that involves waxing, powdering, and bedazzling YOUR VAGINA! And all for the low low price of $115. Wait, how much?! That’s right folks, upwards of $115 dollars if you want it professionally done at a salon!


The first thing that popped into my mind (other than, “That’s really stupid”) was “Isn’t that uncomfortable?” Having a slew of Swarovski crystals glued to your nether regions doesn’t sound like it gives you that fuzzy sweatpants sort of feel. I imagine it feels like having stuff stuck to your vagina! When you cross your legs, does your skin get pinched between all those rhinestones? Can you see the pattern through a pair of tight pants? And what if you have sex? The crystals will likely dislodge, right? Who knows where they might end up after that! Not to mention that it CAN’T be comfortable to rub up against a crystal crotch!

If your like showing off a fancy vajay, then more power to you! You can come up with your own design to express yourself in a way similar to tattoos, only less permanent.

Just LOOK at all the ways you can express yourself!

Or you can write a personalized message, like Skywriting only less public.

If this is how you like to feel sexy then go for it!  But it’s not my first choice. I’d buy a pair of fancy underpants and call it a day. You’d get more use out of it in the long run.

Something to consider before you doll up your downstairs are the health risks involved. In an interview with Time, Dr. Suzanne Merrill-Nach, a San Diego-based obstetrician and gynecologist said, “If you’re putting glue on skin that’s raw from being waxed, you’re really creating a nice environment for bacteria to grow.” Waxing and shaving your pubic area already poses a risk for infection due to ingrown hairs, even without the crystals!

Read more: http://healthland.time.com/2010/03/05/bedazzling-below-the-belt/#ixzz1zm22bbH2

I’m more on the side of Whitney Cummings when, on her show “Whitney,” she said: “When did vaginas get so boring? Do you think a guy ever saw a naked woman and went, ‘No thank you; not sparkly enough?’” Do vaginas spend that much time out in the open that such a design would see the light of day often enough to make it worth the price tag? Bare in mind folks, these patterns don’t usually last even one whole week. Is it just the satisfaction of knowing that it’s there? You tell me! Weigh in with your opinions!

Total waste of cash or sexy new confidence booster?

xo,
Bryce 

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35 Comments on “Bedazzling Your Vajay-jay”

  1. Shaina
    July 5, 2012 at 11:48 am #

    I agree– waste of money. Either way, I’m not a fan of going completely hairless down there anyway. I’m more of a trim-the-hedges kind of gal… Maybe sculpt a nice topiary, if you wish. But all I can think about when it comes to going bald is that it looks like a giant baby crotch.

    To add rhinestones to that equation not only seems unhygienic and like I’d be better off burning Benjamin’s, but also down-right stupid. Unless someone’s going to throw a vagina party and give out awards for the most sparkles, I say save your money. …And maybe save up for a nice asshole bleaching. 😉

    • July 5, 2012 at 1:29 pm #

      This is potentially my favorite comment! I completely agree with what you said about going hairless. I think it looks like a pre-pubescent teenager, which shouldn’t be sexy.

      I do think you’re onto something, though. We should add “vagina party” to our list of future OnceAmonth events!

      -Bryce

    • sheargreniousfashioneasta
      July 5, 2012 at 1:53 pm #

      I say…what is the big deal with rectum bleaching? Seriously….save your money on that too! Anyway you look at them…..an asshole is still an asshole. That is an expensive trend that people have fallen for. Salons love people like that. The biggest percentage of men looking at your asshole probably won’t notice it and or could care less if it was bleached.

      • Anonymous
        July 5, 2012 at 7:46 pm #

        Ha! Don’t get me started on the asshole bleaching (which I brought up)! What a joke that is!

        You are absolutely right that an asshole is an asshole- there’s no way to make it look pretty. Regardless of what you do to it, it’s still where the poo comes from.

  2. sheargreniousfashioneasta
    July 5, 2012 at 1:37 pm #

    As a professional cosmotoligist, and nurse…I say: more power to you if that is your thing, but beware there will be consequence’s! You may think it’s cute and sexy now but I think you will have a change of thought when you develop skin rash,irritating discomfort, and/or infections! In some cases a severe infection/s could lead to other health problems/risks and/or death. Is it worth it? Not to me, I say…leave the vagina alone! Yeast infections are bad enough!

  3. July 10, 2012 at 3:34 pm #

    I thought I loved this post after I read it but this comment thread is the best thing I’ve read in a long time. I’m so cheap there’s no way I’d pay to bedazzle my nether regions. This makes me think of that fake commercial for the Bejeweler with Ivana Trump. She needs to make a vaginal version.

  4. September 10, 2012 at 5:08 am #

    Hillarious. And crazy!
    I can’t recall the actress’s name, but she had each pubic hair plucked out with tweezers, because it was the fashion. It’s painful enough plucking one’s eyebrows, let alone one’s vagina! Ech!

  5. October 4, 2012 at 7:59 pm #

    I actually prefer to be bare there…I feel it’s more comfortable…for me….but I don’t think I’m going to spend my money bedazzling down there..when i can pay for lazer hair removal for my upper lip for the same freaking price!

  6. Just Jennee
    October 5, 2012 at 5:44 pm #

    Oh. My. Goodness. This is a whole other level of trashiness. I never ever thought I would see the words bedazzle and vajay-jay in the same sentence, let alone in the same vicinity. “Vajazzling”? Really??? I thought the tanning stencils of little playboy bunnies were bad enough…but this takes the cake.

    Talk about tasteless. Whoever came up with this bright idea clearly can’t relate to normal women!

  7. October 9, 2012 at 7:18 pm #

    Thank you for this laugh 😉

  8. October 16, 2012 at 5:21 pm #

    thanks for the blog post like and I loved this post – I think I will keep my Va-jay-jay “gem free”!! oye!

  9. December 3, 2012 at 5:53 pm #

    Haha, I thought this was interesting and funny. I personally believe that it is a waste of money, but society is weird with sex and there are plenty of weirder things out there. Either way, good post 🙂

  10. December 5, 2012 at 5:23 pm #

    On a personal level, I have never had anyone close enough to visit the vajayjay and say upon inspection “now what you could really use is a little sparkle down here.” Go figure.

  11. Amyb616
    December 23, 2012 at 3:33 am #

    If you need sparkle – I suggest brushing on a thin layer of Karo syrup, and adding a sprinkle of cake decorating sugar in the color of your choice (or best suited to your particular region) — it’s pretty and dessert 🙂

    • January 17, 2013 at 1:04 pm #

      This could be fun :). “Bigs” has a sweet tooth.

    • February 12, 2013 at 10:09 pm #

      That’s awesome! With Valentine’s day coming up, you could do all sorts of fun things! And I bet a bottle of corn syrup costs, what, $3? A far better use of money if you ask me.

  12. January 11, 2013 at 2:52 pm #

    Hi! Thanks for liking my post. Your blog is really sexual. haha 🙂

  13. January 17, 2013 at 1:03 pm #

    I dunno, but then I’m old ..grins…

  14. Jerry Stolarski
    January 23, 2013 at 12:18 pm #

    Oh My!!!! I wound up here because of a like to my blog. Interesting, different and funny. However, Seems I’m the only guy here or the only one that has chosen to reply. Vaginas don’t need shaving or little sparklies. Now the Karo or even honey with bakery decorations would be a plus though not needed. Lace decor is out of this world. Thongs as skimpy as they can be still leave something for the imagination to play with…unseen territories to explore. In my opinion, that kicks up the excitement and heat level. Thank you ladies. Have fun.

  15. January 30, 2013 at 1:01 pm #

    Haha, this is amazing. I would totally vajazzle at least once in my life, just to say I did. My only reservation would be the whole waxing thing. I wonder if you can do it on top of a really smooth shave job, or if the hair growth would ruin the crystals? Waxing just gives me severe heebie-jeebies ever since a friend went to get waxed and they literally tore a few layers of skin off her labia. Yeah. There basically is no worse sentence in the English language.

  16. January 30, 2013 at 9:51 pm #

    If I were to go to this much hassle and expense I would totally have to show it off. I mean just think of the looks at the grocery store! Yeah baby! I think I would even have to insist on them including my BLING! in my drivers license picture.
    Ok, seriously…….just no. Great post though!

  17. January 31, 2013 at 2:01 am #

    thanks for stopping by my blog – you ladies should read my blog called, ‘all that glitters,’ kind of ties in with this one – love your blog, beth

  18. irishroverpei
    January 31, 2013 at 3:29 am #

    Wow!!!! this site is way beyond my depth and knowledge!!! but that’s an old fashioned man for you. Thanks for visiting my blog.

  19. January 31, 2013 at 5:09 am #

    “No thank you, not sparkly enough!” There’s gotta be a movie in THAT one, huh? PLENTY of positive female parts (um)… roles. Thanks for tipping me off to your blog through mine, ladies:) Send me a list of movies you all watch, let me review them with you-

  20. January 31, 2013 at 8:22 am #

    I think we have hair down there for a reason… between you and your partner, you have a nice soft cushion so the rather tender skin in those areas is not irritated by all the action that is, hopefully, going on there. Getting pubes is a physical sign of becoming a woman or a man. Removing them seems to me like an attempt to fantasize or entice kiddie sex… just sayin’. Trim “yes”, remove completely “no” bedazzle “no stinkin’ way”

  21. January 31, 2013 at 8:40 am #

    Bad me…. I forgot to thank you for stopping at my site (www.miniwonderfulthings.com). What a pleasure to have visiters! As you may have noticed, I am no stranger to bling. I am well known among my friends and family for saying, “If it sparkles, it’s mine!!”

    However, as you may have gathered from my previous comment, this goes beyond my sparkle fetish. I might mention that the body part I see in your photos is not a vagina, it is the pubic bone.

    For a really special bikini at the beach day or pool party, this might be really cool (if you don’t mind burning Benjamins and are unaware of charities that might put the money to better use). You know that DIY sparkles are right around the corner, right? Wait for it…

    I think I’ll stick around with you for awhile and see what else is going on in the world of women that I have no clue about… My granddaughter will be SO impressed when I talk about this stuff with her.

  22. February 1, 2013 at 1:12 am #

    haha..this is so silly…i don’t even understand the piercing craze…its like you are trying too hard to be noticed and craving others’ approval. But that’s just my opinion. Nice Blog!

  23. March 12, 2013 at 3:42 pm #

    Thanks for stopping by….hmmmmm think I will keep my veejayjay sparkle free….it already shines bright like a diamond!

  24. March 15, 2013 at 1:09 pm #

    Every so often I spy on a female blog to gain a glimpse for material for my monthly Female Code humor post. Just when I thought I had seen everything, you outdo yourselves. Which gives me a thought, why don’t men have mini flags? Thanks for the laugh. I’ll be sure to give this post a direct link.

  25. March 24, 2013 at 5:43 am #

    “No thank you, not sparkly enough.” Funny!!

  26. Alan Allen
    April 10, 2013 at 9:12 am #

    There’s actually a song on youtube about Vajazzling. It’s a bit flashy but I guess that’s fitting. Not a bad number.

  27. askmisslolly
    May 21, 2013 at 2:08 pm #

    How & why is vajazzling so expensive in the US?! $115?? There’s a salon that does in my home town (in the UK) that does it for £20.00
    Personally not for me, but they’re now doing the guys version, the pejazzle.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

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    […] of distance and scheduling conflicts, we have carried on posting about topics that range from Vajazzling and “Game of Thrones”-inspired costumes to Crockpot Pumpkin Lattes and Coping with […]

  2. Female Code – April 2013 Edition (Bedazzled Body Parts) « Daily Thoughts - April 1, 2013

    […] Every so often I spy on women’s blogs, just to get material for this monthly post.  For context, you might want to read this blog’s post first [Beware it concerns what some women do to be bedazzled in the private area] […]

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