Ask Mr. XY – First Date Protocol

First Date Protocol. Do you split the bill? Do you pick her up? Open all the doors? Kiss on the first date?

Mr. U – As a man, I ALWAYS pick up the bill. I also ALWAYS open doors, date or not. Kissing on the first date is completely ok, especially if both parties want to.

Mr. V – Every first date is different but I would say if I wanted to increase my chances with a lady then I pick her up in a clean car, open the door for her (open all the doors), and pay the bill. Kiss on the lips if the date went really well and there is that second or two pause at the door, hug if the date went alright but no sparks, and just walk away if it was awful. Haha and if the date goes really really well a kiss on the other lips. I just made myself laugh at work. 

Mr. W – Here’s a life lesson that applies to any and all social interactions, not just first dates: whomever does the inviting, does the paying, unless agreed upon beforehand. It’s that simple. You’ll cut short all of the stupid acts we go through about who ordered what and when and who payed last time. As for all of the “chivalry” stuff, I usually ask ahead of time. While some consider it the antithesis of sexy to ask about how we’re getting to the restaurant or if it’s okay to kiss, I’ve always found it’s best to be up front about things. Thinking you know what you and the other person want is great for some dudes, but you’re never 100% right and not asking permission to enter someone else’s airspace is criminal, both literally and figuratively.

Mr. X – I’ll always pick up the bill, but that’s because I’m poor and feel I have to prove otherwise.  I don’t pick her up.  If the date goes poorly, we will both know it the whole ride home.  If the date goes extremely well, travel arrangements can be worked out.

Mr. Y – I generally pay on first dates (which has come back to bite me in the ass when a bill was a little bigger than I hoped and the relationship went no-where)  I will generally pick her up as well, although at this point, my car is becoming a bit of a hinderance.  The door opening is something I try to do, but I’m not one who will awkwardly race ahead of a girl to open it.  If it happens naturally, I do think it’s the right thing to do though.  I have kissed girls on the first date, I have also not.  If the connection is there, I have no problems with it.  To be honest, I don’t know any guys who would have an issue.

Mr. Z I suppose the Midwest upbringing would demand that I pick up the check.  Also, if you’re the one that asks her out, it’s sort of implied.  “Can I go with you to dinner and then you pay?” doesn’t have the same charm as “Can I take you to dinner?”  Holding doors for people is just polite, regardless if you’re on a date.  A first date kiss?  Depends on how the date goes.  It’s foolish to get worried about that until the situation is in front of you, unless you want to pull an Annie Hall and throw the topic out.  Can’t see that going well, though.

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One Comment on “Ask Mr. XY – First Date Protocol”

  1. sheargeniousfashioneasta
    June 29, 2012 at 8:36 am #

    If the guy asks the girl out…He should: First; pick her up at the door, open the car door when she gets in and out, pull her chair out for her, open the door and let her proceed first, let her order first, wait until she is finished eating with-out rushing her before deciding it is time to pay the bill and leave, After the date walk her to the door and make sure she get’s in her house safe, first date: If you have a good relationship with your parents and or younger; the guy should meet the parents and bring their daughter home safely and in the same condition she was in when you piced her up for the date. Guys may give her a quick peck but only if she agrees the date went well, and only if she agrees to allow you to kiss her. Men, don’t get too pushy on the first few dates…we don’t know you well enough to hold your hand, or have you wrapping your arm around us. But feel free guys; to offer your jacket if it is chilly, and if things arn’t going so well…take the girl home, remain friends and save the awkwardness of a love match that didn’t happen. If the girl wants to ask the guy out, she can plan to pay; but a real gentlemen will go ahead and flip the bill. I was brought up old school and old school I will remain. If a guy refuses to do any of the above, tries moving to third base…I would lose him…he is a dud. And girls if a guy makes you feel uncomfortable; go to the restroom call for a ride and give him the old slip-a-roo.You deserve to be treated with respect and like a princess! Smiles…

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